It’s almost been 30 days since I took the MCAT again, and I’ve gotta say that I’m a bit stressed as that email will come. I wasn’t confident leaving the place, despite my best efforts, and I felt true defeat the first time around, needless to say, I don’t want to feel it again, or in this case, it’d be amplified because it’s the second time, and I took time and money to prepare for this.
I know that my fate is in God’s Hands, and I’ve no doubt that whatever it says on that email, I can always adapt and adjust my life to whatever situations it’s going to call for. But still… I won’t really have much peace of mind until it comes.
And everyone is being supportive about this! Ha ha ha, oh man, I’m glad they don’t see how much their support is adding to this stress. I’d feel bad if they knew… Come to think of it, I think I’ve told them, at least not directly how much their support would kill me if I didn’t do well this time.
Sigh… I can’t let these fears get the better of me. There’s too many things for me to do, I still need to volunteer and get that final Letter of Rec, I’m going to participate with the Knights of Columbus more, thus increasing my volunteering hours and experience, Josue and Norm are each going on various trips to different places, so I have to prepare for what that entails, mainly, doing more things than usual.
But, it still remains in the back of my mind… Just right around the corner! It’s there, the score that I’ve been both anticipating and dreading. I don’t know what’s going to happen! Geez, for something that’s only 5-7 hours, it sure has a pretty unfair hold over the rest of my future!
Well, I guess ranting about it, isn’t going to do anything… Well, it makes me feel a bit better… Monday, man, that’s in 2 days…
Well, I’ve never been one to back down from the future, might as well face it head on.