verb: validate;

  1. check or prove the validity or accuracy of (something).
    “these estimates have been validated by periodic surveys”

The final part of this Heart-to-heart mini-series, but I don’t think it’ll be the last I ever have. So this is the end, the “Prove it!” section of this. Here I will lay out all of the evidence I have to support who I am and who I think I am.

Using my Manifesto as my base, I can provide the evidence on these aspects of my life.

  • GOD: This is my faith, I was raised in it, and hopefully will die in it. I’ve been reading the Bible lately as well as being more involved into my faith through prayers and actions. I’ve learned now that I can’t buy my way into Heaven by doing good things, no, I’ve already been saved, we all have, and it’s because of that fact that we should do good things because of this. I haven’t even lost my temper with Siry in quite some time, I’ve just let it go. I’m no longer going to the Young Adults Ministry due to my feeling that they’re not mature enough to help me grow in my faith, but I feel like I’m growing on my own, and hopefully I can find someone to help me grow even further.
  • Family: Well, as mentioned before, I haven’t lost my temper with Siry, and I’ve been feeling pretty good, despite the fact that I’m currently inflicted with some illness that’s causing me to not be able to make my thoughts coherent, or to make me doze off, or make me feel like my body is heavier than it normally is.
  • Kindness: I’ve been feeling pretty good in terms of my life’s purpose and goals, and I know that when I don’t, I don’t say kind things to myself in private, but I haven’t said these unkind words to myself in quite some time, so I know that my life is improving.
  • Respect: I’m becoming more aware of what’s around me in terms of life. I’m learning that there’s more than one way to become a doctor, as I’m taking the Physician’s Assistant route, and I’m becoming more aware of how well one should take care of one’s health, due to the fact that in the current moment, I’m meeting up with Greggy and Norm at the Gym.
  • Balance: With my new goal, PA, and everything that’s included in it, I’m looking forward to this as a new challenge. I’ll soon be moving forward just like I had prayed for, and I’ll be living with a purpose and my resolve will be fulfilled once again! Looks like Balance will come to me soon enough.

So this probably isn’t what I had originally had in mind when I started it, but I can’t get a single straight thought in, I hate being sick. I guess I’ll finish this here.

To Give Thanks

Day 30: Jot down a list of all the things you’re grateful for. It could be as simple as “Family, Job, Home…” or as detailed as “The bacon I had for breakfast, the weather being warm today, the chance to sleep in this weekend…” When we aren’t feeling chipper, thinking about what we’re thankful for can help get us in the right mindset. No matter how down and out you may be, there is always something to be thankful for.

What I’m grateful for… Alright then!

Family, Faith, Home, Friends, Mistakes,,, Finding Balance, Chocolate, Hope, Music, Wisdom, Science, Nerdy things, Nubuo Uematsu,, Fire, Sentimentalism, Philosophy, Energy, Training, Laughter, Adaptability, Unexpected moments, Food, Life, Self-Improvement, Video Games, Anime, Time spent with friends and family, Christmas, The Wind, The Rain, my Culture, Opportunity, Time, Human Anatomy, TV, Movies, Inspiration, Sib-Ring, Courage, Human Nature, Mother Nature, Medicine, Determination, Kindness, Balance, Art, Prayer, Light, Warmth, Helping others, Guidance, Redemption, Meeting New People, Pets, the Sun, the Moon, The Stars, Travelling, Introspection

Hmm… I think that’s about it, although I’m certain that I’ll be thinking of new things to add to this list, heh, even as I’m writing this piece down, more things come to mind. Oh and of course, I’m grateful for this 31-day Journal Challenge

Red’s Manifesto

Day 29: Try writing out your own personal manifesto. I’d describe the benefits and the how-to, but this short post does it much better than I could.


GOD is first in all things, no matter what the situation or how dire, I will not trade my soul for anyone or anything. I am he who calls upon the name of the LORD for strength. Faith will echo in my footsteps all of my days! GOD saved my life and I will dedicate my life to serve Him and all of His children.

“What man is a man who does not make the world better?”
Quis est homo, qui non in melius?


FAMILY will always be in my heart, “Blood runs thicker than water” has always helped me find the answers to questions. I will always defend, help, and side with my family, regardless of joys and betrayals. I will always help my family with whatever they need, even at my own expense.


There are two kinds of people in this world: Those who CAN help, and those who NEED help.


Only to those who show respect, will respect be given, I will display respect to everyone, Friend or Foe, not to receive it but so that I have reason to respect myself.


Yin & Yang, both of these and all of their counterparts are necessary for a satisfied life. For every action, there’s an equal and opposing reaction. I will balance my life so that I can adapt to any and all situations I will come across.

A Day in the Future

Day 8: Take some time today to reflect on your career. Jot down a timeline of it, including all the ups and downs. What was your best experience? And the worst? What would you like your future to look like, in terms of your career? If you’re a young man and haven’t started in yet, focus on that future part. What do you want your work to look like?

Ahhh, my Career. Truth be told, my career at this current moment is consistent of student working jobs and the odd job. So I’ve really no actual experience to speak of, I guess that makes me focus more on the future part of this prompt. What I would like my future to look like. Hmm… I’ve always dreamt that my future would be calm in one moment and frantic in the other, this is, of course, my dreams of doctor-hood. Talking to people, conversing with them, getting to know them, giving them comfort and hope, allowing myself to connect with others on a level that is consistent of respect and genuine care. I see myself, punching the wall for not being able to save someone, and I also see me picking myself up time after time, only to get back into the fray. I see myself smiling with tired eyes and a battered soul, and yet, I still go in day after day, putting on that white coat, what will be my white cross to bear, and I’m smiling every time I put it on. My future will be balanced between the slow days that drag on for hours in surgery and the fast paced think-on-your-feet moments that will make it seem like there are not enough hours in that same day.

Heh, this is a mixture of what I would like my future to be, as well as what it probably will be when I am a doctor. I have no problems working in a fast pace, nor taking things slow, in all honesty, I would not mind it at all, because that would mean that I’m making a difference in someone’s life, if not making an attempt to save someone’s life. Always trying to help others even at the expense of my own well-being, this is how I see my future.

Evaluate, Verify, Validate

Part two of my Heart-to-Heart with myself.

During that conversation with my family that took 3-4 hours long, my sister repeated this phrase twice, “Evaluate, Verify, and Validate.” Since she repeated herself, she obviously wanted me to focus my reflections on these three words. So let’s break it down, shall we?

verb: evaluate; 3rd person present:

  1. form an idea of the amount, number, or value of; assess.
    “when you evaluate any hammer, look for precision machining”
    synonyms: assessjudgegaugerateestimateappraiseanalyzeexamine, get the measure of;

    find a numerical expression or equivalent for (an equation, formula, or function).

So let’s see, to Evaluate is to start forming, measuring, inspecting, so in this case, it’d be forming an idea for my Self.

verb: verify

  1. make sure or demonstrate that (something) is true, accurate, or justified.
    “his conclusions have been verified by later experiments”
    synonyms: substantiateconfirmprovecorroborate, back up, bear out, justify,supportuphold, attest to, testify to, validateauthenticateendorse,certify

    antonyms: refute
    • LAW
      swear to or support (a statement) by affidavit.

OK, just as I thought, Verify is simply to confirm, plain and simple. The idea that is my Self will be.

verb: validate;

  1. check or prove the validity or accuracy of (something).
    “these estimates have been validated by periodic surveys”

And Validate is simply the providing of the evidence. The reasons of why something is. Why I want this idea to be.

So there we have it. Now I have a place to start this Heart-to-Heart with myself. Hmm, I guess I’ll continue with each word in order and dive deeper into my Self, to see what’s the source of my problems and hopefully, I can fix this and bring balance and peace back into my life.


I remember getting a test back, I got an 89%, only one of my friends who got this score, compliments all around, I’m feeling good about myself, I go home with my head held high.

My Father comes home, he asks about my test, I smile as I show him my 89%, he looks at the paper, then me, then the paper again, and he says, “Ahhh?! Why couldn’t you get 90%” “Oh, well the test was pretty hard.” I reply. “¡Taras! Why didn’t you get 90?” followed up with a hit on the back of my head. “Ow! It was hard!” I say. “Ahhh…” he utters as he goes about his lunch.

“A dose of adversity is often as needful as a dose of medicine.” This particular phrase is the embodiment of the above memory as well as all others similar to it… usually the ones when my Father would hit me on the back of my head, followed by the classic, “¡Taras!

It was all in a lovingly matter, mind you. I’m not sure whether or not he would thought as far as having such conversations would cause me to be humbled or to inspired to be a better person… in either case, it worked. Whenever I’m met with compliments, I take it with as much modesty or humility as possible. It has been integrated into my mind, to not let any personal victory get to my head, to not be prideful nor arrogant.

It was interesting having someone in my life who would constantly, although playfully, call me an idiot when a majority of people call me a genius, is a wonderful balance to my mentality. When someone is constantly praised, without being knocked down in any sense of the word, will cause someone to be arrogant, over-confident, vain.

Every story about a valiant Knight, or a Grand Martial Arts Master has parts in them, when they’ve met their match, when they’ve failed to meet a goal, when they’ve lost. They learn a valuable lesson. Failure, Defeat, Humility in its rawest form. Painful, however, it is what stays with us the most, that’s why the most vivid memories are the most embarrassing.

It’s essentially balance. In my case, being constantly praised for being a genius, will have nothing but negative effects on both my personality and mind. Granted, I’m no genius, I’ve done my fair share of stupid mistakes, simply because I wasn’t smart enough, and you see, I’m able to not only recognize it, but accept it as a part of who I am, as a part of my own past and as a part of what’s going to happen in the future, as much as I wouldn’t want it to be, I’m going to eventually trip over myself, choke on air or water, and laugh at vulgar and oftentimes inappropriate jokes.

In Mexican bonds, we tend to address each other lovingly with a name that’s the opposite of ones highest trait or quality. Using myself as the example, my brothers would mainly call me an idiot or something that resembled stupid, however my Father always stuck with Taras which was something like “dumbass” because my greatest quality was that I was constantly in school and studying and getting a higher education than my brothers. I believe it’s something along the same lines as a Boy named Sue, you bring someone down, to help them realize that they have to fight to get higher and higher in life.

Life has always been about balance, one can see this in every and nearly any aspect of anything! Chess, Call of Duty, all forms of war: Offense and Defense; Yoga, Martial arts: Balance of mind and body and spirit; even science has balance, Physics: Every action has an equal and opposing reaction, Biology: Homeostasis, Chemistry: all chemical reactions react until they reach stabilization; even Mythology and Religion: the world is created, Life happens, then it is destroyed, Yin and Yang.

Balance is what keeps us from being too far to one extreme, from feeling out of place, out of order, and allowing us to become good people, because everyone needs a middle ground of both, strength and gentleness, of tradition and free-thinking, of confidence and and humility otherwise, people would be of one extreme and too much of one side without the other to balance it out leads to disaster, too much confidence results in arrogance, vanity or just plain stupidity, too much humility leads to cowardice, fear of the world, and Living Wallpaper status.

I think by him calling me an idiot all these years, it made me respect and love him more, it opened my eyes to the experiences others are facing in their lives, especially my own Father, who was working so hard.

Perspective is never a bad thing to have. To see the world from high up and from down below, from Gray to every color in the world, from the eyes of a child to the eyes of the elderly, perspective helps us find balance in the most interesting of ways.