Distractions and Creations

Day 23: Make a list of things that distract you. Every man deals with distractions, whether at work or at home. It could be the internet in general, it could be a specific website, it could even be something that’s actually beneficial, and yet distracts to some degree from something that’s important to you. Making a list creates awareness, and you can better slay those distraction dragons.

  • Nieces
  • T.V.
  • NF Chat
  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Brave Frontier
  • Stumbleupon
  • Youtube
  • Random Googling late at night

Day 24: In modern times, men have become more spectators than doersmore consumers than creators. Yet one of the marks of a mature man is being someone who doesn’t just consume the culture around him, but actually helps create it. Think about all the ways you consume the world around you, and the time you spend doing it. Next, think about the ways you can reverse that, and start to actually be a creator. That’s an intimidating word to some, so come up with ways that you can get off the couch and do something productive instead of just mindlessly intaking.

The ways I consume the world… Hmm… Well, at this point, I’m going to probably think that I’m something of a leech, because I have no job and I have my own room, car and I eat food. Throw in all of the electricity I’m taking up having a laptop and cell phone and I’m almost a black hole of consumption. But then I think about what I did earlier today, I gave up exercising at the gym today to build my mom’s armiore/closet. I’m going to be driving Greg to the gym to exercise with me, I help take care of my nieces when their parents need the assist, homework, projects, and even the occasional tucking them in. I drive anyone who needs a ride, and I’m willing to go far for whatever they might need. I’m always open to listening whenever it’s needed, and whenever someone asks me for something, I don’t hesitate to offer my helping hand. So although I don’t actually create anything, I think I’m finding way to make up my consumption of resources, and I’ll eventually get a job so that I can find more ways to create!

Personal Responsibility

Ever since I’ve been back from Chicago, I’ve focused all of my attention on making my nieces happy, and trying to play with them and keep them happy. Yet, I’ve squandered my time alone. I’ve looked up lustful things, and stayed up until 3 am, just plain wasting time. Not to mention that I’ve allowed my eating habits to slip entirely, and my exercising has completely been non-existent, since I had left for Chicago.

So when I was saying outloud, “Man, I need to exercise again.” my niece Isa, overheard me and simply said, “You know, you can always ask us to leave you alone to exercise.” Sigh… There she goes again, with the simplest motion, the Child has once again helped me find an answer to help me find balance in my life, and have taught me a life lesson, all at once.

Personal Responsibility.

Some time ago, When Isa and Siry asked why I worked out, I told them that I always wanted to be as strong as I can so that when they ask me to do anything, I would never say, “I can’t do it because I’m not ______ enough.” Granted, I’m a poor man, so I can throw in “rich” and not feel guilty about it… Well, too much guilt.

So, while I’ve been spending time with the girls, my strength is waning, my stomach is growing… rounder, and over all, I’m getting weaker. My patience is shortened, and my body is stiffer, I’m not as limber as I used to be, which was like, 4 weeks ago!

Man! I need to be the example for the girls that I once was, well that is, one of the examples that they look at. They’ll record everything in their innocent eyes and I do not want to be the one who teaches them distrust and hatred, especially since I know about it first-hand.

So, I’ll keep myself responsible for myself! After all, there’s no one else who’s going to do so. I won’t be the weak link in this chain! I am going to get stronger, so that I will not make the same mistakes as those before me! I know I have it within me to do great things and I’m going to need all the strength I can muster for what lies ahead.

I have to learn that this Life was left in my charge and I have to make sure it’s the best life I can possibly live, to earn my name and this life that’s been spared from Death for so long, I have to check myself on all levels in order to live a happy and fulfilled life. So far, I’m rather lacking on my own levels towards a happy life, that’s probably because I’m still growing and maturing, I still have a long way to go before I can finally enjoy this life on my own terms. I’m actually looking forward to the future.

Now if I can just muster up some courage to submit my application, I’ll be set!


Class Change: Knight!

OK, So April 30th is when I start my 6-week challenge on NF! And I’ve decided to modify my workout routine just a bit more…. Sorta.

Starting on April 30th, I will completely immerse myself into the PowerHowse Challenge, that I got some time ago. It’s about time I used them, although I suppose I needed the balance that NF had granted me, causing me to find peace within myself and with my life and interests. I thought I would find this peace with some Martial art, as they usually bring balance to those who practiced it, but that’s usually after years of training in said Art. So now I really have nothing stopping me from getting into  better shape! No Excuses!

Hmm… So now all that’s left to work on is my diet, and I have no way to fix that, seeing as to how I don’t have any income nor my own place, oh well, that’ll have to come later, perhaps, I can subtly change my diet and just focus on main groups while avoiding others, like soda…

So for now my exercises will revolve around 2 phases: Push and Pull, they are routines that mainly consist of exercises that focus the particular muscle group into either pushing the weight or pulling it. It’s really taxing and I think that’s the best thing about it! I find myself thinking to myself, “I don’t want to do this anymore! I do not want to do this anymore!” but then I see that white figure again and I push myself to the point where I’m just sitting there trying to catch my breath, which causes me to laugh, adding to my weirdness… Boy, I’m glad I’m not at the Gym, otherwise people would think I’m crazy.

OK, so along with this, I will keep to my goals of doing 100 Push-ups a day, 10-15 Pull-ups in a row, and read Machiavelli’s the Prince, all within 6 weeks!…. Awesome!

Pshaw, I got this!

On a side note, I’m now an official Volunteer at the Community hospital that I was trying to get a job at. So that’s half a victory. I was hoping for the job, but I guess I have to wait and see what God has in store for me, job-wise. Heh, maybe I’ll get lucky and get noticed enough to get a job there. And when I do, the first thing I’m going to purchase, are lessons from a Muay Thai dojo and learn a Martial Art! Finally! let’s hope I can maintain the loan payments while doing so.

So all in all, Today was not a grand victory, but a sign of things to come. Interesting things.

I Must Surpass Myself

I was chatting with several friends of mine, one being my lil sister, who reminded me of our arrangement. I must be able to carry her, sideways like I’m going to lay her down, for a brief moment. And when I’m able to do this, I will receive a reward, which oddly enough is our Anniversary gift for 6 years of close friendship. Because truth be told, She’s not related to me by blood but by bond.

That being said, I’ve decided it was time for me to take on the PowerHowse Challenge, I bought from Chad Howse, who’s been more than kind to answer my questions and lack of exercising from the time I purchased the program. But I must admit it is tough. Heh, that’s an understatement, When I’m working out, I finish a set and as I’m preparing myself to do the final set, I’m saying to myself “I don’t want to do this! I don’t want to do this!” But I force myself to keep going and push as hard as I can. Because whenever I’m exhausted or feel like giving up, a voice comes to me mocking me as well as encouraging me by saying random things…

“That’s it?” “You’re going to give up now?” “Bruce Lee always says push beyond your limits. Have you reached your Limit, yet?” “So are you giving up because you’re tired or because you want to give up?”

That last one always gets my blood boiling! Albeit, it’s most likely my own voice, it’s strange enough to bear that older, “looking down at me”, sense, encouraging me by mocking me, Tough love for simplistic purposes.

And I think this works best for me, because it challenges me. I’m not a confrontational person, in the least, however when I imagine the future or look ahead, or even Meditate, I see a white silhouette, I cannot make out much of it, but I can see it’s a man with a trench coat of some sort, he’s standing before me and for whatever reason the wind is always blowing and causing his coat to appear waving to one side, like in an anime. Kinda like this for lack of a better picture:

I can never see his face, yet I know they he’s always looking at me, I know he’s smiling at me, I can never tell whether it’s a kind or cruel smile. Yet I find myself using this individual as a comparison, as a par to which I must surpass, an opponent I must defeat. I get the feeling that he has what I want, he’s reached a goal I’m striving to obtain. And him looking back at me, signifies that he’s looking down on me, like he’s better than me, yet I don’t know how or why I feel this way. He stand before me yet we might as well be worlds apart. I can never reach him.

I don’t know who this man is, and since this came up under my self-examinations and usually when I’m exercising, it leaves me with a hint that this might be me in the future. So, why the animosity?… Heh, I can ponder over this for hours on end, and wind up with no answer… It’s kinda fun,  actually…

Whoever this is, be it myself or someone else, I have set myself his opponent, not his enemy per say, but someone who will try to beat him and surpass his skills and achievements. I do not have a name for him, yet… I wonder though, why is he always smiling at me?

Well, I’ll end this here, as it’s late and I must pray my Rosary before I sleep.

“Be the Change you want to see in this world”

By the wise and humble Mohandas Gandhi.

I’ve always lived by this particular phrase as it bests sums up all of the codes of honor uttered by Knights and Samurais, that I admire so. The strangest part about this, is that sometimes one doesn’t get to see when the changes happen, in most cases, I doubt one ever will, as what we do in life echoes through the lives of others and there for sparks a change in them, causing them to move forward and do things accordingly.

But in those rare cases where you can see a change, the rewards are beyond measure…

Since I’ve found Nerdfitness.com I’ve trained myself rather diligently and routinely, but before I start each session, I always inform my brothers that I’m going to exercise, nothing special, just gives us a moment to see what the other is doing, they’d usually be sitting infront of the TV, while I go to the Garage with the weights. And when I’m finished with my training for the day, I inform them that I’m going for a shower, and so on, this has become routine with us.

Yet today, as I was preparing for my running on the treadmill, I noticed that Greggy wasn’t there… Norm hadn’t come home yet from his job, so I had expected Greggy to be sitting on the couch, and then it hit me… “He’s Exercising…” Granted, Greggy was taking Karate classes at the College, but he never trained at home. Which lead me to believe that by seeing me go exercise myself, I’ve slowly inspired him to exercise, he’d always ask me, “Feel better?” and I’d reply accordingly with wheezing or an exhausted grin.

Now, this could all be just circumstantial, he could’ve just as easily found his own inspiration to exercise and wanted to find the right time to do so, and so on and so forth, and I will not walk around thinking I changed the world just by doing my thing, so I won’t take any credit for anything mentioned above.

So with that in the air, I was reminded of Gandhi’s quote, If one wants to see change in the world, then one must make the first step towards that desired change! I’ve always tried to be a good a guy I could possibly be, honorable, and friendly to any and everyone I come across with, all with the thought that by being the example for everyone to see, of whatI think it means to be a good person, friend, Catholic, brother, and son, then maybe the rest of the world might start thinking this way as well.

For too long have I seen the horrors of people before me, after me, as well as people just like me, fall and take so many others with them, with no reason other than to experience what they’ve been told from the very beginningnot to do. And it truly saddens me, some of them I thought were very good people and to see them fall like that…

So I will make my stand here! Because this is what I believe is the right thing to do! For the sake of those who have fallen and for the sake of those who need someone to help them! I will continue to be a Good Man, and take everything everyone has taught me and make the best of this situation called Life! I will not give up this fight, even if I’m fighting alone! Let the world see that one Man stood up and fought for what he believed was the right thing to do! No matter what happens, I will hold fast to my beliefs and look to the future with Hope and Optimism! Even if I’m bloodied and cleaved, I’ll just smile and say, “That was fun…”

Man, I feel inspired! But I have to sleep! Oh man, it’s going to be hard to sleep now!