Led by a Child

I was standing there, being told the honest truth from an honest child, my niece Isa, who’s asked me to talk to her in private.

She told me that I was being too serious and that my other niece, Sirena, didn’t like me too much because of it. And it was true, I had been rather short with her and lost my patience with her much quicker than I used to, and so, she took it upon herself to pull me aside and discuss this with me. She asked me basic questions, and then, she asked me, “So, what’s the problem?” and then she somehow, caused me to expand my mind, like I did some time ago.

It felt so familiar, this vastness that I had long forgotten, my mind went to work immediately, throwing out the problems and solving it in, what is seen in my mind, as the space right in front of me. My mouth utters fragments of the processes, in loud whispers, heh, confusing my nieces who’s thinking that I’m talking to her, my eyes move back and forth, fixated on floating objects that cannot be seen by others, my mind utilizing every relevant information, data, and memory, to solve the dilemma. And there it was, my answer, that is, the reason why I was being short with Siry, it was never because of her, but her actions that became a sort of, straw that broke the camel’s back, to frustrations that came from others. I couldn’t stop myself from laughing, this child, who couldn’t possibly understand the vastness of what lies within my mind, has so easily guided me as if she was guiding her pet to water.

So, after a few hours, I immediately sought ways to prevent this from happening again, and, once again, Isa was telling me ways to find peace or to calm down should the situation arrive again, to at least not be short with Siry. And once again, I’ve found my answer, Rakuen, a song from the Trigun soundtrack, a very peaceful song that I would listen to whenever I’m done exercising. This song means a lot to me because one time after exercising, I was laying on the garage floor, and I imagined myself in a place just outside the forest, a sort of campground, there was a boulder for a seat, and two logs forming a triangle, then in the middle was a place for a fire, surrounded by rocks, it always looked blackened, as if the fire was already gone, it was always sunny, and clear, and water can be heard from far away.

It was my paradise. My place of solitude whenever anything got me riled up. But it was also there that I saw my Father, I saw his face clearly, yet I couldn’t see his body. He didn’t say anything, nor made any sort of expression that I could remember, but I knew it was him. I was almost in tears at his presence.

Since then, I’ve always gone back to that place, my Rakuen, my Paradise. My place of Serenity and Peace. Yet, I haven’t seen my Father again in there, I keep returning but he hasn’t come back.

And now, I’m here, mind at peace, and all because of this child… a Child… Wait, wasn’t there a child on my spiritual Journey? There was! I never could see who the child was, but I do remember a child and a woman, whom I assumed was the mother… Could Isa, be this child I saw long ago? Causing my emotions to go from perilous to calm and tranquil?

… Ha ha ha! That would be amazing! I mean, I always knew the girls were far smarter than I was at their age, but this is something else entirely! I took that journey way back in RCC, they weren’t even there yet!

This is amazing… For God to have given me, not only these girls as wonderful blessings, but to have one of them, help me on my own life, is something that makes my heart overflow completely.

I know now that this child will be interesting to see grow up, she’s got the potential to change this world, I can see it! To have so easily balanced me out with as gentle a touch one can give, Isa is something special. Heh, and here I have a plethora of quotes and philosophy, wisdom and knowledge that’s been passed down from generations, all laid at the feet of this small child. But the Lord always says, “Keep your faith, like that of a child’s.” I guess this is His way of reminding me of that phrase.

A child has helped me rediscover paradise within my own soul. How more blessed can I be?

 

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Shoes, Not Sandals

“Ey! Put on your ‘choose'(Shoes)!” My Father would yell this at whoever would be barefoot around him, “Or I step on your patitas, and then you’ll be crying!” This is then followed by some comically exaggerated form of crying.

And although hilarious to see, it wasn’t a bluff, because if we ignored his command, then when we pass by him again, he’d aim for the toes and step on them or sometimes by accident, he’d step on them, but in either case, he’d say, “Well, I told you to put on your ‘choose’!”

But one thing I’ve noticed, is that my father only had 2 pairs of shoes: Formal shoes and Shoes for everything else.

He never had sandals, nor moccasins, nor flip-flops, nor Vibrams, or anything else, other than shoes he’d always wear and formal shoes for special occasions.

Earlier today, I’ve observed that when I wake up and put on my sandals, I remain as sleepy and tired as if I went barefoot, but if I put on socks and shoes, my mind starts waking up much faster, I start thinking quicker, and I’d reach a state of ‘Completely awake’ in a matter of minutes, as compared to the sandals, which would take hours.

And now I wonder why I’ve never found my Father wearing sandals, I remember buying some for him, but they’d often be tossed to the way-side, forgotten, and found by one of my brothers who would claim them for himself, and my Father would never have/notice them, until some time afterwards, when he’d look at their feet, and (in his usual manner) question whether or not those same sandals were his.

But whenever it was time to work, there would be my Father, wearing his shoes, getting ready to start the day. And if we wanted to work, we had to put on shoes as well, donning sandals got us sent back inside and unable to work until we had shoes on.

And I can now see why, once you have your shoes on, your feet instantly recognizes the years of familiarity of putting them on before, before going to school, before running outside to play, before performing any sort of strenuous work.

It helps focus the energy through the traction of the soles, by providing a firm grip on the ground, sending that signal to your brain, that your feet are firmly planted, so then the mind thinks, ‘Ok with the feet being solid and firm, we must now react to do the same, lest we find ourselves not picking our feet up high enough and then the traction will have us flat on our faces.’

The mind instantly remembers the amount of traction the shoes have, and immediately adjusts the movement of the legs to compensate for the static friction factor, otherwise, at the angle you move your leg, you will drive your foot either horizontally or and any other angle that doesn’t pick up the foot high enough to avoid the static friction factor of the shoe, and that’s what causes you to drag your feet only a couple of inches, when the body expects a full stride, and what happens then? BAM! You fall forward, because your body has shifted its center of gravity to a point that isn’t properly supported by your legs… Heh, I realize that I throw in science whenever my mind is tired.

So with shoes on, your mind starts working complex problems and adjusts accordingly, and becomes more and more aware of it’s surroundings, and if you’ve just woken up, then that’s helpful in reaching a state of awake faster, than anything else, in my opinion, I’ve tried water, coffee, shower, slapping myself, cooking sometimes helps because of the Fire involved, but nothing else wakes me up faster than putting on my shoes.

The very act of putting on my shoes reminds me of all of the hard work I’ve done when I’ve put them on before, everything from auto body, to construction to Major clean-up jobs, activities that are generally outdoors, and require many hours to complete. After years of doing them, my body now thinks that I’m going to do them again every time I put on my shoes, heh, which is rather inconvenient at 4AM when I’ve returned from taking my brother to the Metro station, and I want to go back to sleep.

I have sandals, but now in the future, I think I’ll just stick with shoes, regardless of the various occasions  and benefits that come with Sandals…. Well, I think I just won’t wear them that often.